LOS ANGELES — We’re a month into the NFL season and we’re finally taking shape. We are starting to know who’s good and who should be prepping for nexts year’s NFL Draft. There are must-win games for a few teams this week and there are a couple divisions that are already wrapped up. It’s Week 5, people! LFG!
1.) Los Angeles Rams (4-0; 1) → In the best Thursday Night Football game ever the Rams showed why they’re Super Bowl favorites and Jared Goff is the quarter-post MVP.
2.) Kansas City Chiefs (4-0; 2) → I can’t wait for the point in the season when Andy Reid is picking plays on a giant spinning wheel and Patrick Mahomes is like, “cool” and throws a 70-yard bomb after running around for 30 seconds.
3.) New Orleans Saints (3-1; 8) → Very quiet three-game winning streak after getting caught in the Fitzmagic blitz of Week 1. Defense will come around and Alvin Kamara looks like an MVP.
4.) Tennessee Titans (3-1; 23) → Are the Titans sneaky elite? I’m not willing to go that far but Mike Vrabel has them ballin’ right now.
5.) Jacksonville Jaguars (3-1; 5) → Maybe Leonard Fournette wasn’t such a smart pick at No. 4 afterall?
6.) Carolina Panthers (2-1; 6) → BYE
7.) Cincinnati Bengals (3-1; 10) → This is a sneaky good team that, wait a second, oh right, I predicted this before the season!
8.) New England Patriots (2-2; 15) → Vintage “everyone is talking about how we’re done so let’s go out and beat an unbeaten team by 300” Patriots win.
9.) Chicago Bears (3-1; 19) → Mitch Trubisky came into the game with seven career touchdown passes and then he threw six on Sunday. SIX!!?!?!
10.) Philadelphia Eagles (2-2; 3) → Something is up with this team and it’s probably the offensive line but let’s see if it’s really Carson Wentz.
11.) Baltimore Ravens (3-1; 18) → I guess I should start taking this team seriously but something about Sunday night tells me it was more about Pittsburgh than them.
12.) Washington Redskins (2-1; 9) → BYE
13.) Miami Dolphins (3-1; 4) → Funny how the standings say the Dolphins are in first place in the AFC East but we all know they’re not really.
14.) Los Angeles Chargers (2-2; 17) → Textbook example of nearly snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.
15.) Green Bay Packers (2-1-1; 11) → Someone wanna tell me why was one-legged Aaron Rodgers out there in the 4th quarter?
16.) Minnesota Vikings (1-2-1; 12) → Still think this is a playoff team despite the last two weeks. Not worried one bit.
17.) Denver Broncos (2-2; 13) → Back-to-back losses doesn’t sit well but I think Broncos would’ve taken .500 in September before the season started.
18.) Pittsburgh Steelers (1-2-1; 14) → There’s a report Le’Veon Bell will report in Week 7. Cool. How does that help this struggling team the next two weeks?
19.) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-2; 7) → Well, Fitzmagic was fun while it lasted. Jameis Winston is back to being the starter and we know what that brings.
20.) Atlanta Falcons (1-3; 16) → Too many injuries on defense are proving too difficult for even Matt Ryan & Co. to overcome. Calvin Ridley is ridiculous, BTW.
21.) Cleveland Browns (1-2-1; 20) → Could you imagine if the Browns were 4-0? They keep finding ways to lose. Someday that will change.
22.) Seattle Seahawks (2-2; 24) → Sucks for Earl Thomas and I don’t wanna hear anyone complain when guys hold out or demand to be in the best situation for them.
23.) Dallas Cowboys (2-2; 27) → Season-saving win by the Cowboys this week and we see what the team can be when Ezekiel Elliott goes off.
24.) Detroit Lions (1-3; 22) → This team is going 5-11 but I have Matt Stafford and Golden Tate in fantasy so whatever.
25.) Houston Texans (1-3; 31) → They blew a big lead and only won basically because Frank Reich doesn’t know ties are better than losses. Hey, it’s an improvement.
26.) Indianapolis Colts (1-3; 21) → I guess we can put to rest any doubts about Andrew Luck being 100% but someone needs to tell Frank Reich ties are better than losses.
27.) San Francisco 49ers (1-3; 29) → It would’ve been easy to fold up shop after Jimmy G went down to big ups for taking the Chargers to the limit.
28.) Oakland Raiders (1-3; 30) → Kudos for battling back from a 14-point deficit but they definitely should’ve lost. Don’t let Jon Gruden tell you otherwise.
29.) New York Jets (1-3; 26) → If the season ended today the Jets would have a top 5 draft pick. That is bad. Very bad.
30.) Buffalo Bills (1-3; 25) → Some weeks you’re the car, other weeks you’re the windshield.
31.) New York Giants (1-3; 28) → This is not a good football team and it starts with the offesnive line and continues to Eli Manning.
32.) Arizona Cardinals (0-4; 32) → Josh Rosen played well and should’ve gotten the game to overtime, that has to count for something, right?