By CHRIS BROCKMAN
LOS ANGELES — We took our Bye Week last week but fret not, power rankings fans; WE BACK! I still don’t really know what’s going on this season but the best teams in the league are starting to take order with little change to this week’s Top 5. Check it out:
32.) Cleveland Browns (0-8; 32) → BYE
31.) San Francisco 49ers (0-9); 31) → You don’t trade for Jimmy Garoppolo and have him stand on the sideline. Play the man!
30.) New York Giants (1-7; 29) → Everyone needs to be fired. Everyone. Cut everyone except Eli and Odell and start over with 51 new players and figure it out.
29.) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-6; 28) → I started Jameis Winston in fantasy yesterday and had I seen his pregame speech I would’ve cut him on the spot.
28.) Indianapolis Colts (3-6; 30) → Hey, look, I get it, it’s fun to win football games but what is this team doing? You’re not making the playoffs. Tank for a Top 5 pick.
27.) Cincinnati Bengals (3-5; 26) → OK, is this finally the year Marvin Lewis gets the boot?
26.) Chicago Bears (3-5; 27) → BYE
25.) Denver Broncos (3-5; 21) → BROCK OSWEILER IS BACK, BABY!!
24.) Los Angeles Chargers (3-5; 22) → BYE
23.) Houston Texans (3-5; 12) → Remember when DeAndre Hopkins said before the season started he thought Tom Savage was a better quarterback than Deshaun Watson?
22.) Green Bay Packers (4-4; 15) → It can’t be said enough often enough how many people Aaron Rodgers is keeping employed in the Packers organization.
21.) Arizona Cardinals (4-4; 20) → Did Bruce Arians really hand the ball off to Adrian Peterson 37 times on Sunday? Did that really happen? He’s using up all the gas left in AD’s tank.
20.) Baltimore Ravens (4-5; 26) → I have zero opinion of this team. None.
19.) Atlanta Falcons (4-4; 19) → Did you see Julio Jones drop that pass in the end zone with no one in sight for 20 yards? The hangover is real, people.
18.) New York Jets (4-5; 23) → What do you wanna bet the Jets bring back Josh McCown as their starting quarterback next season? Man, that’ll be hilarious.
17.) Miami Dolphins (4-4; 16) → So Jay Cutler is going to be my fantasy quarterback going forward. Yup. That’s how badly I’ve screwed up my perfect team. But hey, Cutler scored 35 points this week so LET’S GO BABY!
16.) Oakland Raiders (4-5; 24) → How do you have an 11-point lead with 3 minutes left and then blow the cover? But hey, at least Amari Cooper caught everything in sight. SMH
15.) Tennessee Titans (5-3; 17) → Coming into this week Marcus Mariota had just four touchdown passes. That blew my mind.
14.) Buffalo Bills (5-3; 8) → It took nine weeks but the Bills finally showed everyone what frauds they are. This team is going 8-8 at best.
13.) Washington Redskins (4-4; 13) → I know I picked the Redskins to make the playoffs when the season started but I did not in a million years think they’d go to Seattle and win, in the rain no less.
12.) Detroit Lions (4-4; 11) → I still don’t think Matthew Stafford is worth all that money but he sure looked good on Monday night throwing the football.
11.) Dallas Cowboys (5-3; 14) → Dak looks good. Zeke is gonna go Zeke when he’s in the lineup but Dez is no longer an elite receiver. Someone had to say it.
10.) Carolina Panthers (6-3; 18) → Cam Newton really said the ship needs to stay moving like the Titanic, huh? Strangely enough, that’s not the dumbest thing Cam’s said at the podium this season.
9.) Jacksonville Jaguars (5-3; 10) → I don’t care how good their defense is, I don’t trust the Jaguars to win a big game and never will.
8.) Kansas City Chiefs (5-3; 7) → I’m wondering if the rest of the NFL has figured out the Chiefs offense? Because we know their defense can’t cover anybody.
7.) Seattle Seahawks (5-3; 6) → If Blair Walsh doesn’t miss three field goals the Seahawks are 6-2 and we’re talking about them being one of the best teams in the NFC. We should still be having that conversation.
6.) Minnesota Vikings (6-2; 5) → BYE
5.) New Orleans Saints (6-2; 9) → How much longer before Mark Ingram is getting less than 10 touches a game and Alvin Kamara is getting 25?
4.) Los Angeles Rams (6-2; 4) → I know the Giants are putrid but definitely didn’t see a 50-point game coming on the road by this team. Nice to see Sammy Watkins involved on the scoring too.
3.) Pittsburgh Steelers (6-2; 3) → BYE
2.) New England Patriots (6-2; 2) → BYE
1.) Philadelphia Eagles (8-1; 1) → Carson Wentz added four more to his league-leading touchdown total and Jay Ajayi broke off a long TD run as the Eagles made the top-ranked defense look like a high school team and showed no signs of letting up.